File Cabinet

Recently, I made up my mind to sort forty-five years' worth of file folders of home improvements, updates and purchases in my file cabinet. Oh my,  what a chore, but actually it was a bigger task in my mind than in reality. Have you ever tackled something like this? It seems as if, and maybe it's age related, that I have had a need to clean out, organize and pare down the clutter.

First of all, I simply brought the folders out of my file drawers but I put them on the dining room table, where it bugged me day in and day out.  I could have moved them but I had made up my mind to this chore!  Seeing them there just got my attention and finally, these past three days, I meant business! 

There have been times in the past that I tried to remember what year something was done around the house.  Years go by too fast and memory fades even faster but with slips and receipts saved in a folder, it can be all put on a database for a clearer picture.  This database of household updates will come in handy if ever we sell the house.

So, a new year is upon us and in preparation for it, I have already begun!  I don't exactly get into making New Year's resolutions but I think I can say now that the next home improvement, update or large purchase will be easier to keep track of because the footwork has been laid. 

Courtesy of Pixabay

Something else happened when clutter in my file cabinet got organized...my whole spirit has calmed down. Only after this huge task was completed did I realize what a major accomplishment it was; why did I wait so long!

 I am beginning this new year right, with an organized bunch of file folders that tell a wonderful story of the past forty five years in this wonderful abode of ours! So, happy New Year to each and every one of my family and friends.  There's a day or two left if any of you want to begin tackling your file cabinet, too!  

 

Birth

Courtesy of Pixabay

This is the week! In a few short days, the world will once again celebrate the birth of the Christ Child!  With the pandemic I know this season has been quite different for many of us, curtailing get togethers, and for many, shopping and other things. 

Pondering this very reality, have you ever thought about the positive changes that might have "birthed" in a person because of the pandemic?  I have. 

I received a Christmas letter from a college teacher and was amazed at my reaction at receiving that card and letter. Now, I am not one that gets very excited about sending cards and letters out but something happened inside me, so great that my whole attitude changed about sending my own out. I have sent  out more cards and letters this year than usual but it's what has happened inside me that has been the miracle. Just think about it!  

How a newborn baby, the baby Jesus, changed this whole world and wants to bring new life into our own lives...how has this Season brought new life into our life?  Yes, we can focus on what has been lost, like there being "no room at the Inn" and the being born in company of barn animals and poverty, but what about the warmth and love, caring and concern we can show with a card, phone call or container of soup!

What about being able to see the needs of others more clearly; to feel their struggles more acutely; to respond in ways that would never happen if all of us were not in that same boat in one way or another!  This might be the greatest gift ever! 

Merry Christmas and God bless each and every one of you who read this and share it with others.  This inspiration may be just what they need to help them through their challenging times, too!  What is birthing in you this year?

John Lennon

Courtesy of Pixabay

I have spoken of my cousin, Greg, more than once in my posts.  Here's another one.  Today, I think today, another email came informing me that it is the 40th anniversary of John Lennon's death. This is a bit of trivia that could have passed me by and it wouldn't have mattered a hill of beans! 

Many weeks ago he sent me something, I think it was many somethings, and I failed to reply in some shape or form.  It was a bunch of music numbers.  None of them appealed to my senses.  I will say that if it wasn't Leslie Uggams or the Lennon Sisters, I'm practically illiterate in the music world. So, meaning nothing to me, I ignored all that he sent. 

Well, I don't want to do that again but it did get a reaction from him: I good long, loud, emotional phone call.  He told me off a good one.  All I could do was laugh and laugh and laugh because I really  couldn't understand how someone could get their bundles in a tiff over such a thing as me not responding to something they loved so much, his musical numbers that were hard rock, loud, etc. etc. etc.  I don't even know the name of what you call a lot of the music nowadays!

He even told me our whole conversation and event would make a good topic to post about.  I'm not sure if I'm hitting the mark with what I'm writing or not but I think the gist of his point was that sometimes a person will send stuff that means a lot to that person and whether or not it means something to the recipient, the recipient should at least acknowledge it to the sender. Maybe he's right; I'll find out after this goes out!

So, every day, or ten times a day it seems, something comes in from my cousin.  Another song or music of some sort.  Where and how does he get this stuff?  That impresses me more than the music itself.  I don't quite understand how he does it, or better yet, how he finds the time for such trivia! 

But, it is fun hearing from a cousin who makes me smile and laugh with music that he loves and I really could care less about. Where, oh where are you Leslie Uggams and the Lennon Sisters!!!  And my sympathies to all those who are glad to know of the 40th anniversary of John Lennon's death. 

So the point of this post is: if someone sends you something, music or not, reply and express yourself somehow.  It meant enough to the sender to at least think of you! 

Best Friend

A little while ago I just called my best friend from college days.  I have tried to get her several times in the past days with no response, which is not all that unusual.  Today, a male voice answered, which is very unusual.  It was her husband.  He couldn't have been nicer, talking with me for quite a while.

K has had health concerns for as long as I can remember.  We often talk about her health, life, death and never miss a moment to tell the other, "I love you." Most of the time we laugh and make obnoxious comments about little things that don't matter, often at 3 a.m. when neither of us can sleep. She has had more life than a cat with nine lives... one ailment after another, each one worse than the one before.  

Yesterday, she had a stroke, needing the rescue squad to take her to the hospital. An MRI will be done today.  No wonder she didn't respond the past couple days to my calls.  Something indeed was going on.  Of course, I'm worried, sad and fearful.  Most of all it is all personal because of the possibility of losing my dear friend.

This next week we will celebrate Thanksgiving, with lots of adjustments and modifications for many. November is often termed a "gratitude" month, especially in the 12 Step recovery world. But oh, how difficult it is when real life hits, when our normal schedule and contacts change and we yearn and long for "what was!"

I think living in the present, "not going there" thinking about the future or what can't be right now is the best thing in order to get through some times.  With Thanksgiving, many of us will be enjoying the day with a very few at the table, compared to other years; some will spend it alone because of restrictions of facilities they are in. Life can be a huge adjustment on many fronts for a lot of us.

We will all get through whatever faces us, one way or another. It may be a big adjustment, or not. Either way, I know things are easier to deal with if we can tap into an attitude of gratitude for any little thing in our day. Fear, sadness, change and transitions are part of all of our lives even if each of our details are different. 

So, for what are you grateful? To whom can you tell, "I love you" or to simply call and tell them you are thinking of them.  Maybe you have written notes, taken a meal or extended yourself in some manner.  These actions may not change this coming week at all but they do help us cope and manage a possibly challenging time.  Our attitude and actions help us as well as the other person!

Happy and blessed Thanksgiving to each and every one of
you! 

Maple Trees

As I sit in my chair I see the maple tree outside.  A week or so ago it was green and full.  Now it has two shades of decline on it: yellow on top branches, brown on lower.  Weather is changing; summer is gone, winter is coming. Snow whitened the grass this morning! Signs are all around us that change is in progress.

Some days I'm not so fond of change.  I would like summer to always be here (minus the really, really hot stuff). Also, I would like to always have my youth, good friends and family who never die or distance from me and other things. 

On closer inspection, though, life would really be boring.  I think it is much more exciting when the leaves change color, the seasons bring different colors and temperatures and different friends come into our lives. It's exciting. 

There are times when I write these posts that I wonder if anyone will even read them, when out of the blue, a good friend will comment that one is the best she has ever read!  Hmmm!  We can never know when an ordinary, everyday thought will strike another person and bring some pleasure.  

That brings me once again to what each of us can do during these absolutely abnormal times of stress, fear, anxieties and yes, boredom, because of limitations. It's the little things that matter so much.  So, I continue to write these posts; I continue to call others just to say, "didn't want a thing...just thinking of you."  

Yes, each of us do matter; I matter.  We don't have to jump through hoops, try to cheer anyone up or change situations. But how can each of us do something that will bring more color into someone's life?  That maple tree, because of the change of seasons, will have new life in some months.  What an inspiration!

Are you OK?

I want to share this following article with you, written by the former director of the spiritual direction program I attended, Hesychia, Tucson, AZ. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.  Thank you, Teresa!

a few thoughts on life and spiritual direction Fall 2020 ARE YOU OK? Two commonly heard phrases (or some variation) I have noticed on social media: "Are you OK?" "2020 can't come to a close fast enough." So, I thought I'd ask--are you OK in this long presidential election pandemic year? Can you say with Julian of Norwich "all will be well" and mean it? I'm mostly OK, thank God, but I have moments of cloudy thinking, blue moods and yes, sometimes, a small crisis of faith. I'm grateful that no one in my circle of family and close friends has contracted Covid and glad we're all working pretty much full-time. But the collective grief over the number of people who have died from this virus not to mention those who had it and survived with long-term health issues--oh my. Some days it lays heavy on my heart. I beg God for a way out of this pandemic and God keeps reminding me that we human beings do have a modicum of control and responsibility in all of this. So then I beg God to soften the hearts of those who refuse to wear masks or social distance. I want so badly for us to care for our neighbors by being cautious. Some days I see glimpses of light on that and other days I don't.  And such is the life of many of our spiritual direction clients. Some are boldly embracing Julian's "all will be well" mantra and others just can't go there. It's too fresh, too present and too soon for them. Are you OK? Are you taking deep breathing breaks? Drinking adequate water? Getting some exercise, especially outdoors? Cooking amazing food instead of heading out to eat? And does your state of mind change from day to day?  I would say the big question for the last few months in spiritual direction is " How are you, really? What is heavy on your heart? Where are you finding joy? Where do you find hope? How are you experiencing the holy in this time of "hermiting?" Are you noticing an invitation in the ups and the downs of the pandemic? I hope you are OK and that you have a spiritual director you can "let it all out" to. While I've experienced the same ups and downs as many of my clients, when I am with them for that 50 minutes to an hour, I feel incredibly blessed and grateful to be of service as a spiritual companion. It is, in fact, where I do feel "all will be well." As for wanting 2020 to be over, I don't ever want wish my life away. But I do pray that the barrage of bad news will ease. The year will be over soon enough, and we can only hope 2021 is a time of progressing toward greater peace. Peace.

Resource

I bet I'm not the only one who watches too much TV. One benefit, though is because of hearing all the sad tales of woe  feeling hopeless about it,  my mind gets energized knowing there is a resource to assist with so many situations. 

Families are tipped upside down because of shutdowns, schools are going virtual, parents must figure how to balance work and being home with their children, front line workers are taxed to the brink, depression/suicides are a huge concern and the list goes on and on. Our frontline workers who provide necessary services need our resources more than ever. 

So, what is this resource?  It is spiritual direction.  I have talked about it for years now, trying to explain it. It's amazing how sharing one's story with another can open doors to  peace and insights that don't come alone. It's allowing the divine in our life to guide us when we are willing to step aside and let that entity in.  Some folks say, God, Creator or even the Universe. It's doesn't matter; it's not religious, but is spiritual. 

Yes, I am a spiritual director and can be reached at 920.793.3530 but there are others around. If you want a lay person, religious, or clergy, I have names of others. If you have questions, just call.  Spiritual Directors' International is a great resource.  Because of Covid, distance isn't even a factor anymore. There are several ways to visit and that can be discussed between us.  If there is no internet, the phone alone works. 

Third Chair Spiritual Direction
Molly LaFond
920.793.3530

So, consider it for your peace of mind. No mask required because you stay on your end of the phone; I'm on my end! It may just open some doors for peace in dealing with issues that may be going on in your life. Think about it, then consider giving me or another spiritual director a call!  Thanks. 

Staying Close

My husband and I talk on the phone several times a day. He is in an assisted living and with the Covid situation, I have not been able to visit him since March. There are other ways I have been able to spend time with him but not specifically able to go visit at the facility.  

He called a short while ago.  Some times we sit on the phone and really have very little to say.  In an ordinary day there's not much out of the ordinary that goes on to make headlines out of! So, we just sit and say a whole lot of nothing.  Some calls are perhaps twenty minutes long like this. Not very exciting. 

One thing he said, though, was "it's just a way to be close to you!" That was about the most tender thing he could have said. I reassured him that if we talked "a hundred times a day" that it would be OK with me.  We both admitted that the longer the pandemic has such strict guidelines in place for his safety the harder it has gotten.  We both are very grateful, though, that the administration is keeping residents safe. 

Both of us say things that are more tender lately... little gestures, comments to make one another smile, words of love. I really don't like the saying, "absence makes the heart grow fonder" but this absence is one that I would never have dreamed of.  Indeed, to not be able to hug, hold a hand, give a kiss, sit and visit, not only to a spouse but others as well, yes, it is hard. 

It's not Valentine's Day, but these are the days that our words matter.  These are the days that because of distance, we may have only words of expression. So, why not tell a loved one what they mean to us, something tender, something loving. It's one way to stay close!

"Butt Call"

Have you ever made a 'butt call" with your cell phone? You know, dialed someone without realizing it?  I just did and then all of a sudden that person was calling ME!  I missed the call, so called her back.  This is when I realized what had happened. 

Courtesy of Pixabay

Well, since we know each other well enough, we actually talked about various and sundry things for quite a while.  We too, sit close to each other during week-day masses, at least until Covid hit. Things have not been the same since Covid, but that is nothing new to any of us!

Maybe this phone call was a gift from God.  It certainly was a gift for me, helping me  realize how much I enjoy talking to people that I meet on a daily basis in various  places during my day.  It makes me think that there have been many changes that we possibly aren't even aware of until coincidental situations happen like this butt call. 

I have a list of names that I had called many months ago but haven't called any of them lately. Have you ever thought for yourself how much more energized you, too, might be if you called a few people just to let them know you are thinking of them.  Such an innocent little gesture...simple...easy, and probably would be so appreciated on the other end! Not exactly a "butt call" but it really doesn't have to be, either!  

It's amazing to me, too, that such an innocent little "snafu" can bring one to such a reflection, especially in prompting one to some action. In the bigger picture of life, if one would pause long enough to see a higher purpose, being, or God in all things it might make all the daily struggles easier to bear. At least it has to me; what about you? 

Nurses' Cap

A long time ago, in my nursing life, many of us were looking for a change in the rules for wearing a nursing cap. There were circumstances when the cap really got in the way.  We were not against anyone wearing a cap, just wanted to not be penalized for wearing it. 

A nursing cap meant many things and every nurse worked really hard for years to earn that cap; this reality was a given. No one would contest that. The big glitch was the fact that nursing staff was expected to wear their cap and if disobeyed, were labeled "insubordinate." The mandate was black and white.

Courtesy of Pixabay

Yes, according to the rules, many of us were "insubordinate" and against management, etc., etc. To make matters worse, Joint Commission was coming in a few weeks and wearing that cap needed to reflect the dress policy.  Joint Commission really shakes up an institution for days, weeks, and months ahead of their actual arrival, believe me!

Well,  an underground committee was formed. We heard threats if we were found out. Our jobs were on the line. We were making waves. In time we met with the nursing director. The bottom line was, "what do I do...it's in the policy to wear the cap!" Quietly I said, "change the policy." 

Why do I bring all this up?  I heard this same thing in the Breonna Taylor case last eve that according to the laws, the authorities judged the officers, with the conclusion we heard.  There are a lot of folks making waves throughout the country because of that verdict!

Why are some of the decisions in this country made the way they are?  Maybe it's time we all became critical thinkers, examined the laws and ask if it's time to change them to reflect a broader population, asking how we can bring more equitable justice into these laws. 

We now are more aware of injustices toward women, people of color, age, gender and religion; the list goes on and on!  Yes, peace is wonderful, riots and destruction hurt, but what is the much bigger issue underneath it all.  lt's about time we stopped focusing on black, brown, white, red or blue. 

Then, maybe the populations will calm down, get along and peace will reign if they know they are heard and taken seriously.  The protests are not Democrat or Republican, they are a sign that something much deeper must be dealt with. The nursing cap, dissents, protests...no one is being insubordinate! The unrest is just the tip of the ice berg. It's about time someone listens and takes action on the bigger issues! 

Home

I just returned from a trip to Ohio, my home state.  It has been two years since I had "gone home" so this trip was one I really was looking forward to. I visited all those family and friends that mean so much to me but the pandemic really throws a curve ball in many directions that I hadn't even considered before.  

Y Bridge Zanesville, Ohio

First of all, I wore a mask inside and out, no matter who I was around. It indeed was a "pain" and I easily could have let my guard down and used an excuse to not wear it but my only thought was that I was the outsider and would not forgive myself if someone got sick because of me.

Others had the same concern, which I thoroughly understood. This in itself was enough for me to actually cut some of my plans short, not wanting to expose anyone to something that I may unwittingly transmit.  Yes, this trip was different but my mask, keeping a safe distance and washing my hands often made all the difference. 

This whole past year has thrown all of us a curve ball and the way we do things has changed, too.  Many fight it and argue against safeguards to keep each of us safe.  I get it. However, when I see the numbers continuing to increase I ask myself "why are others so resistant?"  I don't want to harbor in place; I don't want to feel like a prisoner that can't go out. 

So, why not use the safeguards that the scientists have explained to us that work?  It may be just what is needed to stop the ravaging effects of this pandemic.  One other thing on my trip: there was no mention of Democrat or Republican when it came to wearing the mask, from me or others!  It is a medical situation, not political. So, "going home" was still a wonderful trip. Different or not. 

Eyeballs

Many years ago, as a hospice chaplain, I found myself in the  home of a client whose wife was quite angry and rightfully so.  I knew nothing of what I was walking into.  A ball was in motion from previous visits and she let me have it, right between the eyeballs.  I realized it was not I personally she was mad at but it was so hard to sit there. 

                                                                         (Courtesy of Pixabay)

Sit I did!  I listened to every word she had to say.  I kept my mouth shut.  I didn't offer any rebuttal or excuses. It felt like I was there for about a hundred years but I wasn't!! At first she said she didn't want me to visit but she welcomed me to take a seat and didn't kick me out!  

There was follow up I needed to do with her complaints, which I told her I would do.  Communication was the biggest problem.  This isn't the first time I found myself in the middle of anger.  As an RN there were some instances in the ER and I always volunteered to be that staff to talk with the angry person;  I could offer a listening ear, a calm demeanor and empathy when these occasions occurred. 

I wonder how our issues today, especially in light of the riots, shootings, the election and the pandemic, could look if we all took a deep breath, quit blaming one another, and had a resolve to listen with empathy and compassion. Too, to take stock of words we use, is paramount!  The violence has got to stop; enough is enough! Protests are one thing, but stoking flames of violence only escalates it all. Each one of us might try it with one another.  It does work.

None of us could have guessed what we were walking into this year, this fall and continue to walk into.  Comments and actions can hit us right between the eyeballs, too, taking us by surprise and we can find ourselves reacting quite violently or we can slow down, step back and respond in a healthy way instead of reacting aggressively with our words or actions.  It's hard, but the rewards certainly help us to not "kill" one another with words, and maybe worse!  Try it; this alternative may surprise you, too! 

Password Reset

Have you ever had to reset your passwords for online accounts?  I occasionally run into a glitch with my online account at my credit union.  I get the same clerk who has taken care of my concerns for years.  This morning was no different.  It was weird that I could take care of everything from my phone but when I wanted to print a copy of the statement I need to do it from the computer.  Therein was the glitch. 

Courtesy of Pixabay

The first attempt to just do the simple method did not work.  Another phone call.  This second time  I had to completely redo all the answers to the questions.  This is when I asked her if I had "used up all my resets" with her.  She laughed and said  I had not, to call anytime.  

My neighbor, and others, have made comments in the past that they think "God has better people to listen to" than them.  Implying that they probably have no more "resets" in God's eyes. It's amazing how we too easily can get into this thinking, but it's understandable.  With humans we often get fed up when "enough's enough!"  But with God?  Nope.

So, it did me good when I was reassured that I don't have to worry about how many "resets" I must get from the credit union.  I  think making amends, saying "I'm sorry", asking for and giving forgiveness and reconciliation is where it's at.  At least for many of us, it can bring a sigh of relief, peace of mind and makes going on so much easier!  

Windows Update

I have been sitting here with my laptop on my lap trying to write a post but a Windows Update interrupted me.  So, while it was slowly updating, telling me not to shut down, that the process would take a while, my furball, Carmel, crawled up on my lap.

Carmel Asleep

He squirreled his way into my arms, snuggled his head into my hand and simply fell asleep.  I tried putting him aside to continue and he now is across my lap, over one arm.  Get the picture?

Nothing I could do about it for about 20 minutes so I just sat here and pondered!  I wonder if this isn't exactly what God wants us to do when life tries to give us an "update" on situations.  It takes awhile, we don't really know what's happening or how long "this will last."  Whatever the "this" is for each of us...doesn't matter. 

Just imagine crawling up on God's lap, in His secure arms and lap, letting Him hold us in his love, mercy and compassion. A place of safety, knowing that the updates of life are in progress but we need to wait.  We may as well rest calmly, quietly and know that no matter what happens, God is the best "go to person" for our cares. 

I think about these things every now and then.  A cat in my arms gives me good pause to do so.  What about you? In Whose arms might you be held by when your life is in the update mode and you don't know how long it will take?  

Any Good

“Any good, therefore, that I can do …” is the beginning of a quote that is familiar to some of you. Have you ever wondered what you would be or do when you grow up?  I still say that, even though some say I am no longer a "spring chicken!" I have been having periodic “chats” with God lately, telling Him that I really don’t know what I should be doing now, what direction my life should take, among other things.  

A best friend of a relative of mine is facing health concerns for the second time around.  Her family and ours were best friends  growing up, so it hits pretty close to me. My relative told me one of my posts really helped this friend of hers when I had referred to the Serenity Prayer.  I have said this before that we never know what good we can do, or have done by our example or kind words. This was one of those times.            

Courtesy of Pixabay

"I shall pass through this world but once. Any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any human being let me do it now...for I shall not pass this way again."  The pearl I take from this quote is that if I am open to that divine spirit within me, and listen to that small, still voice inside, I will know what I am to do even if it doesn't seem like an answer to a far off question of my future life. 

Perhaps it is enough to reach out to a friend with a letter, a phone call or a meal.  Maybe a gesture or compliment would warm a person's heart. Doing some good or showing a kindness goes an awful long way.  What is that spirit calling you to do? 

Dirty Shirts!

These past months of Covid-19 have given me an opportunity to get some work clothes filthy dirty...really filthy dirty!  My husband is no longer able to clean or organize his workshop so a wonderful friend, who loves to organize, has been my right hand helper!  It took us a month to clean the front "gymnasium-sized" room, now we are tackling the back room, nearly as large.  Only a smaller one is left to do.

Well, I have never been so excited to get out there and get dirty.  We shuffle stuff, haul stuff down from the rafters, I cut cardboard on the jig saw and cut old wood on the chop saw!  I get so excited to see the progress. Sometimes I go out in the shop later in the day just to marvel at how organized it is getting! It's a space that is becoming very inviting.

I don't know what this has to do with anything except looking back over this past year I can see where my anxious insides were compared to now and organizing the workshop was a big deal on my mind and the thought of how to do it rattled my coping. I couldn't just leave it for the future because I still didn't know how I'd deal with it. 

There's an awareness that has come. When  I simply ask, "do you know someone who..." like putting up ceiling tile, or cutting walnut logs into 1" boards for later use.  Resources are there, I just don't have to be the main "information operator" for all the details. It's not necessary to accept the first "I don't know" that comes along...someone knows somewhere.  

That goes for not only physical concerns like ceiling tile, organizing or logs but for spiritual and emotional concerns. Having someone to process inner situations is just as important, and rewarding, as it is to find resources for physical items those inner areas could be grief, relationships with self, God or others, beliefs, loss of faith/hope, etc. etc. 

So, tomorrow I can't wait to get up and put a clean work shirt on because I will be ripping two long 2x2 boards in order to make some lengths to make a frame for pegboard. The organizing continues and it thrills me to no end to have someone at my side who keeps me going when I feel overwhelmed and want to run away. My dirty shirts give me hope!  I know the progress that happens; tomorrow I will have a clean one on!  AAahhhhhh!!!  What do your "dirty shirts" do for your spirit?

Wait

I wonder if anyone has missed my posts lately, wondering if I dropped off the face of the earth!  Truth of the matter is that I locked myself out of Facebook and was waiting for a reply from them in my attempt to get back in.  My computer guru who has been helping me said, "it might be awhile."  So, wait I did.  Have you ever been in a similar situation when life threw you a curveball? What a question nowadays, huh!?

Courtesy of Google

It gave me  another opportunity to take stock of the Serenity Prayer: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change..."  But oh, so difficult, when so much is out of our control.  Another situation occurred this week also that I needed to accept...well, quite a few, but details sure don't matter.  I'm probably not alone!

How do you get through times when you must accept those things that can't be changed?  With this virus and wearing mask issue I was so upset yesterday I called a friend and "cranked" to her...which led to a few laughs at the same time!  That helped change my "cranky" channel. Talking with a friend who is helping me make a couple of chairs helped, too.  This conversation actually made the original concern much better.  It was a good thing I went and talked with him. 

So, sometimes our situations become huge boogy men in our mind but with some conversation with others and a willingness to see a different perspective, things usually work out as good or better than before.  Have you ever experienced this?  

I'm glad for those of you who continue reading my posts, and especially when you share them.  With so many businesses challenged during this pandemic I am so glad to reach a wider audience to offer spiritual direction. 

It excites me to meet new clients from a broader area, and you sharing these posts helps tremendously.  Thank you to each and every one of you who not only read these posts but who have given me wonderful feedback and encouragement.  It's a two-way street of benefit!   And thanks again for passing them along! You can't know the individuals who have shared with me how spiritual direction has been such a blessing to them.  

Excitement fills me for you to read this post, but I will continue to wait until I can get it on Facebook!  "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change..."                      

A Picture!!

Has this pandemic got you feeling like this picture looks?  Some days I don't know if I'm the only one with concerns for my personal safety until I talk with others. To me, it's too soon to open up. With states beginning to open up, lots of times because of politics and economics rather than safety, many of us still have concerns as to what our individual responses will be.  Concerns might revolve around family functions, graduations/wedding or weekly church. Maybe it's just being cooped up!

I have also had requests for spiritual direction "when this is all over and things open up." We all would like life to look like it did before the pandemic hit but I'm so afraid we are all in for a rude awakening and we are beginning to see a new normal occurring right before our eyes. 

Then, during Dr. Rick Bright's testimony yesterday he talked about a "dark winter" that we may experience because of insufficient actions to keep the population safe.  That leads me to the topic of how spiritual direction now can assist an individual in navigating concerns in one's daily life. Talking with my own spiritual director is something I would never put off, even if it is by phone, messenger or zoom.                      
I have not shut down my business, I have continued to have appointments and even though these other ways of meeting is different than face to face, it is very acceptable. There is still a confidential, contemplative atmosphere, and it is there for you in this time of turmoil, change and apprehension. 

Actually, now it is easier to offer it to you, not limited in driving to the appointment. Long distance is not a problem, no matter where you live.  If you have any questions, please feel free to call to discuss how we might connect, depending on your internet capabilities.  At the least, the phone is very acceptable. I never thought I would resort to the phone but I no longer want to wait till the pandemic is over. I want to offer this availability to you, too.

Consider it.  Covid 19 has affected us physically, emotionally and spiritually.  Spiritual direction is about  having a spiritual companion during this time.  Please consider this gift to yourself. So, don't keep feeling like the above picture.  It may be too soon for some things, but it's not too soon for spiritual direction. It can change your inner picture! We can work out the details.  Consider calling me at: 920.793.3530.  

Broccoli

Courtesy of Pixabay

Have you ever said to yourself, "I hate _________."  Fill in the blank. My cousin, in our infrequent phone call right after Easter, shared how he is trying to stop using the phrase "I hate..." and broccoli was the first thing he thought of; he then proceeded to expound on that word, "hate."  He realized it wasn't as black and white as the word implies but earlier years of various times eating broccoli, he is just not fond of it. We have all been there.

There are other words like "always" and "never"  that leave no room for any grey on the spectrum.  This brought us to the idea of believing in God or not.  This is a very hard concept for some. 

One thing about my cousin is that he is always trying to live in a good, orderly direction.  He is very thoughtful, compassionate, respectful and loving. He realizes how the word, "hate," is a strong, antagonistic, limiting word.  I really think words like "acceptance", "tolerance" and "like" would be more to his liking in his vocabulary. 

He proceeded to go into a theological direction, sharing his "heady" explanations and beliefs.  He readily shared his words that are in his head, explaining his stance on his lack of belief in a God. I have known many people who have an aversion against formal beliefs and dogma surrounding a particular religion or even the thought of whether there is a God or not. Sometimes, the faith and beliefs some were raised with end up not supporting them in later years; so it is with my cousin.

One thing that caught my attention was that he is always doing the right thing, is kind to others, respects and is tolerant.  He lives in a very good orderly direction. He could agree that this is how he tries to live. I then proposed that even if he did not have a formal thought of the presence of God that within this good orderly direction, God is there. 

This was a new way of thinking for my cousin. He wanted me to make a post of this conversation and after we talked awhile he said, "You know, I couldn't put my thoughts all together but I knew you would come up with something.

It might behoove each of us to think of things we might "hate." Sometimes we may just need a good conversation with another person who might see or say something in a way that opens the heart to other ways of thinking. 

Maybe it's such that if we no longer say "I hate (broccoli)" we can come to be more tolerant and accepting and be conscious of living with new thoughts and behaviors. I wonder if this isn't the real meaning of Easter?  Happy Easter, Greg!

Holy Thursday

Today, Holy Thursday, Maunday Thursday to some, begins a wonderful liturgical time called the Triduum. It encompasses, Holy Thursday, Good Friday and then Easter. 

Holy Thursday recalls the institution of the Eucharist and the priesthood.  It isn't about being on a high pedestal or thinking one is better than the other but of service. This is when Jesus washed feet, an act of service. We are asked to do the same, asking ourselves how can we serve one

Courtesy of Pixabay

another. 

It means a humbling of ourselves to be there for others. Lately, for me, it has come to my doorstep in a very concrete way when I received 3 masks from friends to wear during this corona virus pandemic.  Our ways of serving one another can take on many different forms, limited by only our  imagination. 

So, even though today is a memorial of the institution of the priesthood, each of us is called to this priesthood of service and ministry of being there for others.  How will that look like for each of us?  Think about it.  And God bless you during this Holy Week 2020!

Ma Bell

Courtesy of Pixabay

Some may not remember the original telephone company, Bell Telephone.  The splits and breakups occurred and more and more names of phone companies came into the headlines.  Those were the days when each long distance phone call had a price.  It was cheaper to call on the weekends and after 9 p.m. 

There were times I would call home, not wanting much of anything, and just wanted to hear mom's voice.  Of course, those days were long before the computer, internet and cell phones, even if I do not want to admit that I am no longer an eighteen year old!  Once she out rightly asked if I was homesick.  I denied it but she knew!

My mom was famous for informing me of the cost, especially if I called on a day other than a Saturday or Sunday.  Then dad died as well as a couple of her friends.  One day she called me on a Monday, of all things.  This was very unusual for her, and she really did not have much to say. 

I played my mother with her and told her that it was not prime time to call and wondered why she was calling on Monday.  She simply said she was "reaching out to touch someone!"  That was their advertising catchphrase. I bet many of you do remember it!

So, Ma Bell was way ahead of this pandemic curve.  That catch phrase is most pertinent now. It works and helps us all to stay connected.  It's not the end of the world but we need to live in some very basic ways for now. Maybe you'd even want to make a call.  Thank you, Ma Bell, for helping us take good care of one another by "reaching out to touch someone!"

Cat Wash

Have you ever had a cat wash?  Yes, you read that right...a cat wash!  I had my first big cat wash yesterday morning and it was the neatest thing yet!  Let me explain.  You know how cats will lick and groom one another? Well, my older cat, Pepper, did that to me as I was laying next to her; she licked the whole left side of my head for the longest time and indeed, it was wet. For cats to groom one another is a huge sign of love.  I just smiled and smiled as she did this. 

This morning I read two entries on Facebook related to this virus/pandemic. One shared how three women, former Holy Family Memorial employees and now volunteers, are making plastic shields for staff. The second one was from an employee at a care facility explaining what they are doing for residents to assist them and families in coping. Actually, a third was a message from the HFM hospital CEO reaching out to viewers with numbers to call and then resources to assist us in coping. 

It was amazing what these individual ways of reaching out to "us" helped me to feel more optimistic and energized. I got to thinking how a car wash (yes, now carwash) cleans our car and even protects us from dirt, salt and the elements.  All these individual acts felt like an arm of love around me, washing off some anxiety, sadness and fear and all that has come with these days. 

Pepper

So, how have you felt like you have been reached out to, washed and had a good "cat wash" lately?  Some of you may not be cat people, but it sure is an analogy for me that struck a cord all the way to my heart.  The bottom line, too, is how can each of us give another person a little "cat wash?" Hearts in windows, plastic shields, face masks, phone calls, entries that encourage on Facebook...some sign of caring and love...the list goes on and on...if we do!  Thank you, Pepper, for your wonderful cat wash!!

PS.  You might even share this post to others in order to give them some "love" knowing you care. Thanks! 

Facemasks

I am a fan of Mitch Albom. A friend of mine and I went to a presentation of his in Green Bay many years ago and meeting him has been a delight, even this many years later. He wrote Tuesdays with Morrie and other books. Now he has podcasts called, Tuesday People Podcasts. In one of the podcasts he talks about our need to be helpful. 

He cited how children are so ready to help when asked.  It excited them and they often came back after one task asking what they could help with next.  I sat through the whole podcast and it was like someone lit a fire under me. I had been sitting on a phone list of folks I was procrastinating calling.  

That did it!  Immediately I called the people on my list and felt entirely different about that task;  I had been useful to those I called and felt better for talking to someone, too! Of course, my mind goes out to how to be helpful during these times with the pandemic raging.

Courtesy of Pixabay

Then I thought of various posts on Facebook asking for help from the public in making surgical face masks.  Lots of ways to do it and lots of folks pitching in.  There are other posts offering to help those who need something picked up, or delivered, in order to save that person from going out in public.

Yes, these are times we have never seen in this century but hopefully, they are times we will see more love, more generosity, more kindness and compassion toward others. Each of us can figure out what helpful means for ourselves; there are as many ways as there are finger prints.  Thank you Mitch Albom for your weekly podcasts! It was the most helpful thing I have heard all week!

Cranky

Last week when I heard the assisted facility where a relative is went into complete lockdown because of the virus, it really didn't phase me too much.  I know I am not alone and "we're all in this together." That was a week ago or so; I'm not counting days. 

Courtesy of Pixabay

Many functions have canceled, churches have canceled services, support groups, we're asked to stay put and tensions are rising.  I thought I was immune but this morning I'm a bit cranky.  

I dropped something off to the facility and the woman who answered the door asked me how I was doing, so I told her!  She shared that the state of affairs there is getting to others too.  I could see tears in her eyes as she said this. Someone waiting in the entrance way share some of her own issues, also. 

After picking up some necessary groceries I headed home, put them away and went on with the rest of the evening, fixing supper, finishing some tasks and here I am writing this post.  The crankiness is gone, I have a bit more energy. 

I remember a Tao saying, something to the effect, that if we are in a river with a strong current, the best way to get to the other side is to go with the current, it will take you to the other side. We are all in a strong current right now, a river we can't control.  However, we are all swimming and trying to stay afloat as well as trying to get to the other side.  I wonder if what  helped the crankiness today was not fighting it but going with the current.  

We'll all get to the other side eventually; the complete lock down will let up at some point.  The song, "Impossible Dream" plays: "When we walk through a storm, keep our head up high and don't be afraid of the dark...though our dreams be tossed and blown...walk on, walk on through the dark...we'll never walk alone! Walk on with hope in our heart and we'll never walk alone!"  I am no longer cranky!   

Pepper

Pepper

Lately, my 7 y/o kitty, Pepper, has been acting very close, especially a short while before it's time to get up. This morning I was lying on my back when she crawled up on my chest and abdomen.  She was stretched out with her head on my chest; she often purrs at these times. I wondered if she was hearing my heartbeat.

I remember my vet telling me, after I had to put one of my cats down, that certainly the second cat knew this fact, able to hear that his brother's heart was not beating.  She said a cat's hearing is so acute that she thought for sure he knew his brother was dead. 

As I laid in bed with Pepper, it just overwhelmed me thinking that these days of social distancing, routine life gone, a quieter atmosphere than normal and reduced activity have given me time to listen more acutely.  It's also Lent, with Easter in a short few weeks. 

How often do we rest our head on God's chest to listen to His heartbeat, to rest in His presence with His arms around us, just feeling His love and guidance.  It is there but it is so easy to get distracted with all of the present happenings. If we really quiet down and listen we can know He hasn't left us, that He is very much alive. His heartbeat is still beating; nothing will extinguish it!  

So, we can be in turmoil with all that is happening around us or we can trust that these days, weeks and who knows how long, can bring us into closer intimacy with the One who loves and guides us...if we listen to that Heartbeat.

Local Restaurant

Yesterday while looking at the computer I saw that the local restaurant we go  to up north now has a drive by window for pick-ups. Yes, this pandemic has forced change in many ways, but if they didn't change, it would be the end of their business. I can't imagine what they did to make their building accessible, let alone the cost and other factors. 

Amazing what happens in the quiet of being alone, with time to ponder things. I got to thinking about other major changes that surely will follow but one has been catching my attention, especially with Easter approaching. The question is: "How will our churches minister to parishioners during this time?"

Many are cooped up in facilities with no family or friends being allowed to visit, kids are home from school, parents can't work, physical distance is being asked with the words "social distancing" but more than that, how do we stay connected in spite of it all?  And I go back to our spiritual organizations.

Then a bright thought came to mind...at least for me it was a bright thought!  What if there was a directory of all parishioners that provided emails, phone numbers etc. so a pastoral team could call those folks just to touch base and let them know they were thinking about them! If each parishioner had this directory we could call one another, too!  It would take less time than travel, but it certainly means a different energy especially if the parishioner was hard of hearing, didn't have a phone and other things. 

Maybe the connection would have to be with another family member who would have to relay this attempt to the shut-in.  But at least that person would know they were being supported and concern was shown. The call also wouldn't have to fall on just a small pastoral team.

I don't even know who to mention this to, being Saturday, offices closed and no phone numbers but Facebook, sharing the message, getting on the horn and talking...we can do it! We are all in this together. We are not helpless. And there's no reason to act hopeless. Even our pastors and leaders need our encouragement with ideas. The grassroots is a large arena for getting things done. We do not always need a council to take a vote.  

Is this a viable idea or not?  The schools are reaching out to those kids who are deprived of a meal so are delivering and making available bagged meals.  M

Courtesy of Pixabay

any are being deprived of spiritual meals too.  How can we deliver some spiritual support to those in need!  

If we don't figure out how to revamp our churches' ministries somehow, I'm afraid it will be the end of what is vitally important to many of us.  We can do it.  We are as good as the local restaurants but we need to take action now!   

Please share this post, please!  Thank you! And God bless each and every one of you.  Prayer is one thing but action springs from this prayer and our love of God!