Arms of Love

I mentioned in a couple of posts ago that I need knee replacement surgery. Nothing was planned at that time but now it is.  One thing I have come to appreciate through all this is something many of us take for granted...someone's arms of love.

When we go through major situations in our life we often or usually have a spouse, partner or family close by. So then what happens when we don't?  When I say family I mean immediate family; I am not discounting the in-law side at all, but it's not the same. This is when I miss my husband who was there to hold my hand during times like this! 

Preparing details has brought me to the realization that we do have options.  As friends have said, "I can help. Be sure and let me know what I can do." It takes a willingness to open up to these offers, as much as we certainly don't want to impose or put them out! 

Yes, I would like it if I could coop up in an inpatient rehab for a couple of weeks but what happens if that does not materialize? So, with every phone call, every offer to help I am slowly realizing how blessed I am for friends, who I believe really mean what they say.

Where is my faith that all will work out?  If I truly believe what I say, now is the time to put it into practice. It's hard but sort of like Peter seeing Jesus who calls him to walk to Him on the water.  For a second it works, until he takes his eyes off of Jesus.  And when Jesus holds him up, Peter cries, "don't let me go, don't let me go!"  Jesus won't let me go either.  He won't let any of us go!  

He's got a strong grip on us through any tough situation we may find ourselves in.  This Christmas season is that time to renew our belief that the tiny Christ Child is there for each of us and will not let us go.  We must be like that child, in need of friends and family who are in our life to hold us in their arms of love. We must let them!

Courtesy of Pixabay

Light

 A few times in the past several weeks my friends have commented on their anticipation of Dec. 23 when the darkest day will come but with knowing the days will begin to get longer, more light.  I think many of us share that same thought.  

You know what is also coming December 25! How many of us share the sentiment that if it were not for the faith that that Child Jesus brought, available to each of us, hardships, trials and challenges would be much harder to get through.  Often my friends have said, "I don't know what I'd do without my faith!"

Yes, our faith in God, can be a huge light in our life, and even a wonderful strength for others who witness it in us.  One friend of mine has commented in the past, "you have a really strong faith, don't you!" It was a compliment for sure. 

My parish offered a bible class using the series "The Chosen" which was for 3 seasons.  At the end I commented that I had attended many bible classes but this was one I never wanted to miss, watched the weekly movies multiple times and got so much out of them.  Other class members agreed wholeheartedly. 

In this day and age, we need something to hang our hat on.  For me, it is knowing Someone, (Jesus), has gone through far worse than me and does understand when my (our) journey gets tough.  This gives me peace.  Some days I don't feel so strong but we are encouraged to keep on.

So, with Christmas in a few days, I don't think it is a coincidence that the days will get lighter earlier. With Jesus in our life, He says that his "yoke is easy and my burden light" (Mt. 11:30) and by taking on His yoke our life might get lighter too, offering a light beyond all understanding. 

Merry Christmas to each of you and yours!  

Courtesy of Pixabay

Diving Board or Steps?

 Ever go swimming,  run right up the diving board to dive in to get in fast?  Or are you one who slowly walks down the steps to get wet? Life is sort of like that.  For the most part, I like the diving board. 

Have you ever anticipated something, hoping to correct a situation, and certainly knew your solution was the answer, only to hear a better solution, even if temporary. Reminds me of asking God for something, assisting you in solving an issue and the answer was "not just yet!"

Well, this was my answer in response to my need, as the m.d. told me, there are reasons to slow down a bit. Even though those weren't specifically spoken, the gist of it is that conservative attempts to alleviate pain are being tried for now. 

When there are a couple of underlying issues that would be best to minimize before surgery it all makes sense.  As one of my non-medical friends said with this analogy the picture is like "walking down the steps into the pool rather than diving off the board into it!" Yup, this was a good one!  I will eventually "get into the pool" but at this moment, not as fast as I had planned.

Of course, the saying goes, "tell God your plans and see what HE says!!" So, many  of you have been praying for my cause, of which I thank you.  Now, please keep praying for me so I know God's will in the rest of this picture. Timing is of concern.  

I often tell clients that God will guide and not let a person down.  I truly believe this grace is for each of us to know what to do in circumstances.  Right now, it probably means that trusting the slower approach will still get me into a pool of healing and will yield just as good of results as diving in, even if it takes a bit longer! 

Courtesy of Pixabay

Some News

I just got some news today that I need a knee replacement.  I am joining "the ranks" of those who have had replacements of one thing or another...although the date is still pending. 

First things first. However, I am ready, well, getting there.  First, I must see the ortho surgeon and discuss details but I don't plan to put it off. I have been struggling for over a year with very little progress, which has been frustrating. 

Being Thanksgiving week there are still areas of great blessings. One of the biggest blessings is that pain does not scare me, in fact, when others say, "it will be painful" as they have for other surgeries/procedures, it just wasn't the case for me. Also, even though I live alone now I have many friends who will help with a multitude of tasks if I need. 

Then, to hear that "so and so was up walking outside the same day" makes me so optimistic. I may try walking outside but with winter nearly upon us, I have my doubts!

I am still stuck in the days when patients were kept in the hospital for days and days, hardly able to move, sick a day or two from anesthesia.  That was the norm...no longer.  Thank God!

So, prayers are always appreciated, for sure.  If you leave a message on the answering machine, that will be like a hug! But right now, there is plenty to do until then!  I have gone by the saying, "Faith, Family and Friends, for many years.  What more could a person want! So, that's the news from...me to you!

Thanksgiving

The holidays are upon us!  Thanksgiving is this week.  Every year at this time the word "gratitude" fills my heart.  Even when life becomes or is challenging, there is so much to be grateful for. 

I look outside and see the roads are not slippery, no snow yet!  Chores that have been a challenge suddenly are all completed, thanks to a bit of help! Future concerns are aligning with certain appointments. 

Have you ever noticed, too, that when you look on the side of gratitude life pans out pretty good? So, from our house to your house may you be blessed this Thanksgiving week. Whether you are with family, friends or alone, may you have peace in your heart as well as gratitude!  

Courtesy of Pixabay

Veterans

 To all veterans: Thank you for your time and service keeping us safe.  Watching all the Veterans' Day programs brings it to the forefront the challenges you went through, sometimes with little to no appreciation for it...until years later.  Sadness fills my heart for how many of you were treated.  Some are still fighting for deserved disability benefits. I have no words except my thanks and appreciation for what all of you did for us, the United States of America!! May God continue to bless the United States and may God bless each of you!

Consider it

 When I retired, went to Tucson for spiritual direction training I couldn't imagine my future at that point.  However, in retirement, a person still yearns for meaning and purpose.  Actually, a need "to belong" I think, is one of our most deep needs. Belonging to a family unit, work system, friends...you name it. 

I never imagined becoming a spiritual director would fill that need but as much as it is wonderful on my end, it is that much more rewarding when I see a client's spirit soar when they come onto a reality or truth that resonates with them.  

Those realities have come in all different ways. When their heart hears God speak to them, or in spite of their life having changed in so many ways that they are so blessed in new ways, it becomes clear they are being helped in ways never imagined.

When Covid hit everyones' way of living and getting together changed but lately it has opened doors that never would have presented themselves otherwise.  It opened the option of meeting on Messenger/Zoom and other online resources.  Now, I even attend some meetings by phone, Zoom and Messenger.  It sure saves travel time and expenses. 

So, when I look where all my friends and acquaintances hail from, lots from out of town and out of state, let me invite you to consider spiritual direction from afar. You might even  consider sharing this post with your friends to inform them.  Comments are really positive from those who are at a distance and meet electronically.  

Think about it.  Give me a call or email me, we can talk and discuss any questions you may have. (mclafond2014@gmail.com). I have a few openings in my schedule and want to make this opportunity available to you.  Thank you!

PLAN A...B

Have you ever had your "to do list" all ready, wanting to tie into those tasks to get things done, especially when it was necessary to winterize, get outdoor details squared away? Then the weather forces a showdown with steady rain and when not raining, wind becomes relentless...all week. This was my "plan A." 

I have learned it doesn't pay to argue with Mother Nature, so a good friend and I took a nice long drive, ended up having a wonderful lunch and enjoyed the fall colors that were more muted than not. We then played many games of Rummicube;  she beat me so many times which gives incentive to play again; hopefully, I can redeem myself!! 

Have you ever said to yourself, when you are not able to get your intended "to do list" done, "it'll be there tomorrow, what's the worse if it doesn't get done today?" It usually pays to know there is a "plan B" in life. 

That goes not only with "to do lists" but our reaction to others, philosophies, different cultures/religions, etc. It is a choice to go to "plan B" as well as our choice in how we react, speak and behave. What is the worst if I keep my words and thoughts to myself, especially when it is just to disagree?  The weekend ended up being very relaxing and peaceful; that was a choice, too!  Just a thought! 

Courtesy of Yahoo

Pruned

 Last week, for safety sake, I had two beautiful, old, huge oak trees pruned because one massive limb had already broken, missing the deck, patio and porch.  There was another very large limb hovering over the entire house.  If that had broken off it would have done immeasurable damage.

So, as hard as it was, I called a friend who does tree work.  It took many hours to trim and as each limb disappeared I wondered how much of the tree and shade would remain. 

However, the "other side of the coin" occurred to me. It was later in the day, the sun was shining through into the porch.  The flowers potted on the patio below the windows outside had struggled a bit because of the shade. I suddenly realized that now more sun would shine in those areas making it easier for some flowers to survive. 

Looking high to the two oak trees I could see the canopy of limbs and leaves that still remained. There was still a place for the birds, squirrels, flying squirrels, raccoons and yes, even bear could climb up!  These are sights I relish enjoying as I watch my "outdoor channel."

So, going one step further, how do each of us react when something in our life is "pruned"?  It could be a need to downsize, a family death, a financial adjustment, a loss of a friend, health issues...you name it, even Covid. What  does the "other side of the coin", this transition offer us? What can the positive change offer us when it happens?  

I never imagined this perspective until I sat quietly long enough to let it hit me that even though two beautiful oak trees needed to be pruned, it can have a personal perspective in our own lives if we let it.  A peace came to me and it might you.  This peace might not have come without the sadness of losing something so beautiful.

Courtesy of Pixabay

STORIES

Have you ever taken a trip that you were just busting at the seams to take, planning for months and months?  Well, my best friend from high school (a couple of years ago!) and I just returned from an Amtrak trip to Seattle! 

It took 2 nights/3 days on the train both ways and 3 days there. We certainly had no illusions thinking the trip would be like riding in a top-shelf car but we weren't ready for some of the surprises we did find. 

All along the way as we laughed, giggled and sometimes wondered about elements of train travel, we continued to say, "this will be a story." Yes, a short blog here will not allow any details in that story but looking back over life there have been many "stories" in my life and I'm sure yours, too. What are they?

For us, it felt as if a "guide" was with us the entire trip through so many situations. This occurred in ways such as having a helper point us to a restaurant "right there" to a kind gentleman "voiding three parking tickets" I received from the train parking lot. 

There were so many times we looked at each other and were simply amazed at how this whole trip panned out. Now, on the other side of a long awaited trip we are so glad we went but gladder still to be home. Our bags didn't allow much space to bring mementoes home but our hearts full of memories sure have lots of stories!! It's great to have a life-time friend to share them with. 

Courtesy of Pixabay

A Little Procedure

In May I had a little procedure , but  then again, when it's YOU, no procedure is "little"!  The phone rang, nearly off the hook, from well-wishers, asking how "is it going" and telling me I was in their prayers. 

In one day the phone rang eighteen times! At first I was half annoyed until someone replied, "oh, how loved you are!"  And continued, "I don't even know that you know it!" 

So, I have spent some time thinking about just that, how loved I am! Have you ever been in a spot that crimped your plans, laid you up or put you out of commission for awhile?  It isn't fun and takes a bit of effort to feel a sense of balance once again.

Here are some of the "gifts" that came my way: Eighteen phone calls in one day, more to follow each day after that, food for the freezer; friends who acted as my "uber" drivers; friends who sat here and helped me with pillows and ice; friends who helped me paint the workshop walls...and the list goes on and on.

If I don't feel loved through all of this, I don't know what it would take!  I am so blessed!  How about you? In what ways are you loved and blessed.  Take a bit of quiet time to ponder this bigger reality that may get lost in the "little procedures" of life!   

Courtesy of Pixabay

Spring Chicken

 Lately I have been hearing the words, "advanced age", "not a spring chicken" and other  words that imply I am not in the spring of my lifetime!  I'd like to smack "em all when they say these things...and yet, it's true! 

However, as I read and come upon a chapter of a book that talks about our "mission" lately I have asked myself this same question, "what is my mission?"  I have written about this in other posts but bear with me. 

I have been a spiritual director since my retirement in 2012 and love meeting with individuals to listen to their journeys.  At my 50th reunion yesterday a classmate asked if I missed chaplaincy, which I did for 23 years.  Spiritual direction is different but still ministers to a person's spirit rather than the physical issues as in nursing. 

When I hear feedback from those who are coming to me as to how spiritual direction is enriching their life I am so blessed that I can be a conduit for God's presence in an appointment. When I hear the comments and see the results it truly is amazing.  Right now, this too, is one of my missions. 

So, if you know of anyone, or you yourself might consider spiritual direction, email me with your contact number then we can talk; I can explain more to you and possibly meet for an hour or so.  It just might be something that enriches your spirit, too! (mclafond2014@gmail.com)

So, "spring chicken" or a young chick each of us can have a mission, which certainly brings meaning and purpose in our life; large or small...it matters not!

Courtesy of Pixabay

50 YEARS!!

 Have you ever gone to a class reunion and wondered if you would recognize classmates you have not seen for fifty years?  Yesterday I attended the yearly nurses' luncheon.  Every year a class is honored and my class of 1973 (fifty years for those who are counting) was honored. 

Four of us planned the day; I was on the registration table when the guests registered.  It was amazing that I was able to (just about) put a name to most of my classmates.  A few had changed looks so drastically I wasn't sure. Two instructors also came; what a joy to hear their memories of the school years!

It was so wonderful to see every one; memories came to mind and it was so refreshing to share some of them and these memories were still alive in the others!  One who was my closest friend came and it was as if no time was lost at all between us! 

Afterward I pondered the times I did not attend these luncheons, thinking I wouldn't "connect" or recognize anyone.  Now, having attended the lunches regularly it is so refreshing to go back each year, renewing acquaintances that gently turn into friendship. 

So, if you have the opportunity to return to a function that connects you to the past, a family reunion, a school reunion, I hope you go.  It has become a very warm spot in my heart.  The scene of different folks lingering and visiting at the end said a lot as to how they were enjoying their time, too!  

Holy Family School of Nursing Class of '73

Options

Many years ago my place of employment was looking to expand, build and find an off-site for management offices. They announced their plans.  However, some weeks later, word changed that they were scrapping the original plan and going with plan B. With great frustration an employee asked, "why do they always lie to us?"

I had already come to realize there are always "options" and what at first may look good another option actually may turn out to be the better choice. This was really the case; there was no lie intended and no lie given.

When we get in a tight pinch we sometimes don't realize we too, have options, no matter what the situation.  We may possibly not see the alternate ourselves but with input from others, another side may become evident. 

I believe that life always gives us more than one way of dealing with challenges. Sometimes it's just a matter of looking within ourselves, asking the divine spirit for guidance. We may need to listen to that "still, small voice" or may need to ask others. Either way, we always have options!

Slow Going

Have you ever had something occur in your life that slowed you down longer than you would ever have imagined?  I am in the middle of a "slow-down" right now and it's no fun.

Last summer my neighbor had shoulder surgery that slowed him down for the entire summer and most of the year. He has been my barometer especially when I haven't been able to do what used to be simple things like putting furniture out on the deck. It's frustrating. 

At least my neighbors help me put some perspective on situations when I become impatient. I also have a new appreciation for those with chronic pain.  That's no fun either.

 At any rate, it's wonderful to have friends who give words of encouragement, understanding and a helping hand when needed. Otherwise, it's been a good year and a good summer.  Hope yours has been too!

I thank God for all my blessings even when life is a bit slower than normal right now! 

Courtesy of Pixabay

Freedom

Have you ever been the focus of a tirade from someone who blasted you but in reality, the issue was much deeper than what might appear on the surface? I recently had this happen to me yet, the real issue was how much freedom was being lost.

I went through this when my husband kept deteriorating, finally ended up in a nursing home and couldn't drive.  The final loss of freedom was that he had to leave his lifetime home and the shrine he and his dad had built to honor the Blessed Virgin Mary. Until he verbalized this to me I would never have guessed.

As July 4 has come and gone, there are veterans and those who have come to the United States as refugees.  They express such love for what they have found here, unlike the country they fled. Only after listening to their stories can we get a perspective.  Natural born Americans take so much for granted. 

Perhaps it would be helpful to connect with a veteran or a person who has immigrated to America.  Once we understand what their journey has been like might we have a deeper appreciation for what we have and could lose if we take life for granted. I would certainly hate to lose our democracy in this modern American era.  That would be the hugest loss of freedom for all of us! Think about it!  It is never too late to realize how fragile freedom is!

Courtesy of Pixabay

God Bless America! 

Follow-up

This is a follow-up from my prayer request for my relative who had had a stroke.  He is now back home and doing OK.  He has a small speech deficit, needing to search for the correct word or two, and has some numbness in his hand. Physical therapy is in the conversation, I think. 

He is at the age where retirement might offer some real challenges financially, so he and his wife will need to process that option. Insurance, income and meaningful options are certainly a source of concern. 

I want to thank each of you for your prayers and support.  The numbers of my readers who offered support with your comments as well as sharing the post with others, so they could pray is so heart-warming.  I would hate to NOT reach out and NOT pray because I wouldn't want to see what the outcome would be in that situation!!

Don't know if you have ever noticed for yourself how hard it is to pray especially when in the midst of a crisis or in quagmire.  Being too focused on the event just blocks the ability to focus on praying; it is so nice to know how you lifted me, my family and this request up.  It is like a life jacket around me, as well as my family.  They thanked me every time I told them my friends were praying for them. 

I am truly blessed.  Thank you again for being the friends you are to me, for praying and lifting these needs up.  We sincerely appreciate it! 

Prayer Request

 I believe in the power of prayer; I hope you do too. This post is an urgent plea to my readers, friends and family for prayers for a relative who has suffered a stroke, after a history of tia's.  He has a wife and two small children with no other resources but his income alone. 

He has been transferred to a top-notch stroke unit and is in good care but there is great concern.  I have seen miracles occur with prayer and faith in the Great Physician.  Thank you in advance for your support and care.

With such a public forum as FB I will not be giving any details to any questions.  Thank you for understanding. 

TV

 This is Memorial Day weekend, 2023. I have been watching Viet Nam tv programs and have learned more by watching it than living during that time when my friends and classmates were being drafted in the 60's and 70's.

A few years ago I was talking with a friend about these programs.  He said, "I don't watch them; I was there!" He was in the Tet Offensive which meant nothing to me...until I watched a historical clip.  Oh, my!!!

I know there were protests during that time; my best friend led some of them and is on the FBI books. I know the soldiers did not get a good sendoff, and a worse,  painful return home. 

As I "get educated" by watching these programs my sensitivity grows.  My last conversation with my soldier friend a few months ago I was able to share with him just what I am writing here.  

I then apologized for my lack of awareness and education about his chapter in history, then thanking him for all he went through.  He was very appreciative, even at this late stage, that I recognized his service. He continues to deal with trauma from that time, as he explained a few gruesome details.

So, let us not forget those who served, sacrificed, fought, and lost their lives for our freedom. Thank them for their service, too...and not just the Viet Nam vets...any vet you see!  Maybe watching tv might be an educational eye-opener.  It was for me!

Enjoy your Memorial Day weekend;  our freedom cannot be taken for granted. Thank those who have fought for us. 

Lists

Have you ever had to prepare for an event, large or small, and had lists of what needed to be done before that time? I'm sure you have.  It seems I have lists going for nearly anything and when I look at them, I am prone to waiting till the last minute to get them all signed off.

Maybe I'm just prioritizing, like waiting until I go upstairs to bring some things down that need to be down!  So, my living room floor and steps are decorated with reminder slips for when I go. Why the slips? This helps keep the mind clutter free and avoids forgetting details of what needs to be done. 

This is also the first event I am preparing for without my husband.  It's different to say the least.  Friends are certainly helpful and available but it's not the same as having another family member right under the same roof. 

Why do I write about this?  How do we take care of ourselves when decisions have to be made, when we're alone? It does no good to get into a heap of fear or tears. One day at a time, one task at a time, check off each item of the list and before we know it, it's done! voila!

So, the next time there's so much to prepare for, make a list, check it twice, and get going!  Don't forget, too, to take care of yourself by enjoying something enjoyable, like a good movie and a meal with a friend!  Some of those other things can wait! 

Little Chat

Yesterday something happened that was amazing!  While in church in the morning I had a little chat with God.  If you recall other posts, I often have these chats, especially asking, "what am I  to do?" OK, go to 2pm yesterday.

The phone rings.  A familiar name and voice, in distress on the other end, cries, "I need help!" The details don't matter but within 40 minutes we were at the emergency room getting what she needed.

Often during the next 5 hrs. waiting for labs, phone connections, etc. etc. etc. she encouraged me to go home.  Her disposition for care was not definite yet and no way was I leaving until I knew what was what.

So, to make five hours short, I finally left, knowing the plan until she got admitted. Sometimes sitting in an emergency room is about like watching grass grow! (Of course, there are times when it's too exciting!!)

As I was leaving a huge wave of gratitude came over me, giving thanks to God for my past both personal and professional; to think I was on the other end of that phone when she called. 

Again, I have mentioned "coincidence" in the past but in this case I know it really was God's way of remaining anonymous.  She will tell you, too, that the idea to "call Molly" popped into her head.  Wonder where that thought came from?  Especially after she had prayed to Jesus to know what she should do!  Hmmm.  I sure have no doubt. What about you?  

What happens after you have a little chat with God?  Or do you?  Might try it if not. 

Courtesy of Pixabay

Peacock Feathers

 While in Baltimore this past week my sister showed me three peacock feathers.  Her neighbors have peacocks so this was a treat to see. I don't know if you have ever seen them close up but the design on each of them was similar but different. 

Courtesy of Pixabay

She then showed me a picture on her bedroom wall of a strong, muscular hand and finger reaching out to a limp, weak one, not touching yet.  

Courtesy of Pixabay

Well, her inspiration is that each of us are so alike, yet all different.  Of course, we all know this but how often do we get upset when another disagrees with us, or we reel when a person of color comes to live in our neighborhood (or comes to the door or into the driveway by mistake)?

There are so many ways we fight the differences in our everyday transactions. Ask however, how many ways our Creator tries to reach out to us, to touch us and lift us up?  It could be a kind word, a phone call or a generous gesture. 

How often do we let that gesture "touch" us, to smile, receive it and say "thank you" knowing that the love that came was not a coincidence but a power beyond trying to connect with us. 

So, the peacock feathers now remind me that we are more alike than not but each an individual; the differences make this world a beautiful place to live, if we could simply realize it.

That strong connection, care and love is there reaching for each person more often than we might realize. Maybe it's time to see things with our heart instead of our eyes. How is your God trying to connect with you?

Long Trip

Have you ever taken a long trip? What was it like for you? I just traveled over 2000 miles to visit family and friends in Ohio and Maryland. It was a lot of driving over 10 days or so and actually a wonderful Easter day and week afterwards.  Weather was perfect and the warmest we've had so early.

When I think back of all those I saw I personally can't fathom it all.  One thing that happened was that several wished I could stay longer, explaining how honored they were that I would take the time to visit. 

A niece who lives a bit "off the beaten path" from most of the family clan explained her feelings to me. She shared that when anyone comes her distance and wants to stay over, she is honored to think they want to spend time.  I certainly could relate to her because Wisconsin is not the first place most want to come to; this distance is not exactly "across town".

An amazing thing occurred in my spirit during this time.  It became very clear how loved I am and important my presence is. This presence in the entire family system (and system of friends) cannot be minimized. For the most part many wished I was staying longer. 

It's a fine balance when visiting anyone; my dad routinely told us at home that "even fish start to stink after three days!" That message sticks with a person for a long time, not wanting to wear out the welcome!

So, even though I was ready to get home and had a wonderful time, the whole trip impressed me with how deeply I am loved by family and friends alike. The other side is:  how much love did I radiate to others?  It's a two way street!

This is huge; how often do you think of this?  I mean, to really let it resonate inside of you?  Are there times and situations that have left you feeling very, very loved...I mean, from the inside out! And, how much love do YOU radiate to others?

It can be very profound when a deeper awareness happens, but we need to take time to let these bigger messages of life sink in. Sometimes it is a long trip of life to reflect on deeper meanings but they are there for each of us. Sometimes chaos and traumas get in the way but even in this mess there can be found a pearl of great wealth.  I found a pearl of great light!  Hope you do too!

Computer map

New Life

In a short while Easter will be here.  Over the years this highest of holy days has taken on a new meaning for me, especially in light of Holy week, the Triduum which is Holy Thursday, Good Friday and Holy Saturday.

Last year I don't remember a thing about Lent except Holy Week.  I have to think hard even about Easter. This is my reflection: Many of us have struggles that have made me even say, "I don't want your cross(es), I will keep my own, thank you!" Some journeys are convoluted, challenging with no fast answers: financial, kids acting out, illness/death...you name it.

They are dark days; days, weeks and months go on and on and on.  Then something changes: yes, even death of a loved one.  Often we hear, "it was enough!" 

Easter in our Christian faith means Jesus' resurrection/new life but what about each of us? Some journeys are like the waiting of Holy Saturday, waiting in the tomb with no new life (yet) and it gets hard waiting. 

But, over time we may notice something changing. Our spirit now has a positive energy, we "find" ourselves.  Yes, Easter gives me hope and more than that Holy Week reminds me that all the dark journey we go through, most of us will find a new life spiritually, emotionally and in other ways.

So, hopefully we can see Easter in a very practical way, in an every day way.  Being an "Easter people" (look this up!) is not just a saying but a very real and practical saying that can give us a real hope that there will be new life at the end of a very dark journey. Our actions should reflect this.  Of anyone, Jesus certainly understands our journey!  

A blessed Easter to each of you, your families and your loved ones!  May each of us find new life this Easter!

Courtesy of Pixabay

 

AGAIN!

The news is on again:  3 children, 3 adults shot in a school...again! Thoughts run through my mind: "Where is the NRA in all of this?" "Why can't our representatives get a stronger bill passed to make guns safer?"

Then another side of me starts to "argue" taking sides...hearing the black and white argument that one side or the other is "trying to take our guns away!" But then, thoughts shift, "if this were a car, would we try to find safer cars, safer features, more reasonable speeds?"  Remember when seatbelt mandates came in?  Oh my what a fight!

I know this whole scenario is about taking away our rights to have and bear arms but there is a bigger issue of how to keep us safe? Something needs to change!  This is a crisis like no other...again! 

Then I wonder will my little town in Wisconsin be next?  A thought I dread! How can we make guns safer without taking them away? Prayers and condolences go only so far...then we need action!

Please feel free to pass this post along!

Courtesy of Pixabay

Now What?

Have you ever noticed, looked back over your life and realized it was easy to figure out what you were to "do" with your life's journey?  You know, become a nurse, farmer, work construction, etc. but then time marched on and those jobs changed, retirement came and we now ask ourselves, "what am I to do now?"

It's amazing how many times my friends and acquaintances have said this to me lately. Twice in the past several years I was in this predicament myself.  I don't know if it is a lonely spot of the heart to be in but it definitely is a real spot to be in. 

Not knowing what to be "when we grow up" is a real existential ache for sure. Well, with my faith I had a little chat with God, and I meant it.  I talked with Him just like talking to a friend...I really was serious. 

Now, this past couple weeks I was thinking about the various things I was  "doing", actually minimizing them quite a bit.  It even included writing these short little posts which have brought frequent comments from folks who say the messages help.

So, getting in the car just this week the answer came clear as a bell:  "Keep on doing what you're doing!" See, we don't have to be locked into a schedule that sets us up at a particular time of day or week. 

So, what are we to do now? Doing small things, reaching out, helping others, being present, offering encouraging words...just keep on doing what you're doing!  What more can we ask?!

Sails

Have you ever had to "tack your sails"? That is a sailing term for what sailboats do when they get blown off course, redirecting the boat so at least it keeps going forward. It simply changes course a bit. 

Have you ever been disappointed, original plans gone awry?  Sure, we all have. I remember a work friend who came back from a "camping" weekend, upset that it rained, ruining all their plans! 

Well, we can be upset and then decide to go to plan B, C or even D! Another work associate complained one day because of all the "interruptions".  The nature of the beast in our work, however, was the fact that interruptions were the mainstay of what we did! 

Life is like that every day.That includes death of a loved one(s). Too often it could be real easy to sit, be sad and wish for the past for what was lost. However, that "course" only gets us going down a rabbit hole. 

This is when looking at a different perspective on how to live the day is "tacking our course."  Yes, it takes energy, willingness and an attitude that this journey will be better.  

So, that's why the picture of a boat tacking its sails comes in handy for me.  We don't have to abort our plans, we don't have to go into a useless rabbit hole of depression. We must keep going, though.

It helps to realize life is like that and then go to plan B, C or D.  There will still be excitement and meaning if we allow for those changes in our life.  We are not in charge! Some things we just cannot control; some things we can!  We can look at our own sails and how we will tack our own boat of life!

Courtesy of Pixabay

Traffic Signals

Going into town yesterday was about the fastest trip in a long time;  all the traffic signals were green the entire way! That is totally amazing because in the eight mile stretch, there are plenty.

Of course, I am delighted when things go so smoothly because sometimes I am a tad behind schedule, wanting never to be late for an appointment. I would rather be ten minutes early rather than late. 

As I came to each intersection I wondered how long this good fortune would continue. Thoughts came; "this is sort of like life."  Sometimes our life goes smoothly, other times we get stopped and we must wait for circumstances until we can move on. 

I'm not real patient sometimes especially when I don't know how long the light will be.  Same way in life, waiting for an answer from a Medicaid application or a Medicare situation, can tip me upside down. 

It even came to me that when life put me in quagmire and I could hardly move I finally resorted to prayer.  Maybe a better perspective was that because of being slowed down I had the time to pray...couldn't do much else at that time! Life often puts us in the fast lane and it can become a struggle to carve specific time out to pray. 

There are kids/husbands/illness...you name it;  even finding time to pray is a challenge.  Ash Wednesday is upon us, the beginning of Lent. It is a time to slow down, take stock of our spiritual life and be a witness in living our Christian life. 

 This is a perfect time to pause a bit to reflect on our own life, our red lights, orange lights and even green lights. What do all the green lights do for us and can we identify the benefits and blessings that have come because of our  orange and red lights? What messages are these signals bringing to you?  I was amazed.  Maybe you will be too. 

Courtesy of Pixabay

Our Heart

For those of you in reader-land who are without a spouse or partner, have you ever wondered how you will celebrate Valentine's Day when you have no special person in your life?  

I suppose for some, you might feel sorry for yourself, sit home alone and mope.  Others may just chalk it up as "just another day" in order to not feel the pain of being lonely. 

When the 14th comes around I think of Carrie, the person who was my surrogate mom for eleven years of my life.  I never knew what "nanny" meant until I was an adult.  That's what Carrie was to me, but more like a mom.

Carrie came from the hills of Ohio, had no running water, no indoor plumbing, an outhouse and she's the one who really showed me what "a chicken with it's head cut off" really looked like...in preparation for a Sunday meal!

Every holiday, birthday and Christmas, she lined her walls with all the cards people sent her and she knew how many there were! Her daughter in law, Alice, was my first baby sitter, when Carrie wasn't there.  I plan to call Alice in a few days to tell her again, my warm memories of all those years.

Alice lived with us; dad helped her attend high school; she was only seventeen.  That was a long, long time ago but memories are as fresh as can be.

I sit here and wonder why in the world my mind did a time-travel but then again, it's Valentine's Day in a few days.  I also remember the bouquet of flowers, artificial roses, my husband, Jerry gave me a few years ago from the nursing home gift shop. They make me smile every time I look at them, very thankful they never wilted!!! LOL! 

So, how is your heart this coming week, when that special day arrives? Sad, Grateful? How can you share it with another person, even if you are alone?  Phone someone, send a card, go out to eat? It's a time to fill your heart up with love and to pass it on! It's time to not only care for your own heart but hold someone else's near and dear.  Happy Valentine's Day to each and every one of you!  

Courtesy of Pixabay

OTTO

Another great movie: "A Man Named Otto." Lately, the word "light" has been getting my attention and watching this film today brings this word more to my consciousness. 

Otto was in the depths of grief after his young wife, pregnant six months, had died after a train accident and paralyzed. His whole life was dark after that, to the point of attempting suicide several times but averted by one situation after another.

Neighbors had befriended him, including a feral cat.  He finally had an awakening and decided to live and not be the crank that he had been. Even in his most crankiness he was light to others in more ways than what he even realized.  

I wonder if the trick, however, is to be conscious of how we can be light to others. Situations can present themselves to each of us but do we slow down long enough to see how they can be of light to others?  Personally, it may take awhile to ponder, quiet down and listen to the small, still voice to see what is feasible. 

Grief, ill health, laziness and a whole slew of things can divert us but just think what would happen if each of us recognized that every single one of us can be light to another. 

Like the priest shared at mass today, we have an hour more of daylight than what we had at Christmas time. It's not only the time of day that brings light but each one of us brings light  in big ways and small ways.

How can each of us brighten up the room by God's light inside of us when we enter a room. A smile?  Leaving our own troubles outside? Speaking kindly, not complaining?   How about giving it a try!

Hacksaw Ridge

On the recommendation of a friend who is also a deacon at church I just finished watching "Hacksaw Ridge."  Yes, I would recommend it too, even though the war fighting was challenging to watch. It certainly was inspiring.

This fellow enlisted in the war but was a consientous objector and refused to carry or touch a gun.  Reasons stemmed back to severe chaos at home. He wanted to be a medic, to help his comrades, not to kill.  

He was ostracized, belittled and snubbed until those in his own platoon saw how he had rescued many, many men because of his determination and valor.  His light really shined through.  His physical resources were nearly drained and when he was nearly at the end of his rope he prayed to God, not knowing what he was to do, until he heard the moans and calls of the wounded. 

He devised a way to lower them off the ridge and prayed to God, "help me to save one more person."  Repeatedly, again and again, "one more person." Have you ever wondered what your mission in life is?  

How do each of us know if we are doing God's will?  I know when I asked God this very question with my husband's declining health, a clear message came to me, "you take care of him in his old age."  It sounds kind of hokey but it was clear as day, directly into my heart and nothing I had to question. 

I know we might think this is an easy task because perhaps we tell ourselves, "well, I'm retired, I'm this or that" but perhaps life becomes hallow and we end up wandering around aimlessly. 

There are lots and lots out there that we can "do" even when we are limited and handicapped by blindness, limited mobility and other things. Have you prayed and really asked God, or the universe if you don't believe in God, where you can be a blessing to others in some way? 

Then after that, we must listen to hear what message may come.  The trick after this is to act on it. It might be as simple as picking up the phone to connect with someone who comes to mind, or write a note, or say a prayer for them.  Then again, it may involve becoming active in a group, church, the senior center. 

Hacksaw Ridge strikes me much deeper than just a war movie and the actions of one soldier. It is a real life example of how we can let our light shine in life, no matter the darkness, chaos and struggles around us.  Maybe just praying, "just let me help one person." God really is there for each of us.  How will you let your light shine? 

Courtesy of Pixabay

One More

 Yes, one more!  One more what? Another horrible trauma, be it by shooting or brutality, white or black, it doesn't matter, the news just never seems to stop. Now Tyre Nichols's breaking news and the anticipated release of his assault by five black police officers in Memphis. First of all I can not imagine a mom, family or friends going through a situation like this personally. This is just a single event today, not mentioning others!

The crux of it, however, is we ALL are going through it every time we turn on the TV or electronic device. I personally turn away in horror, change the channel and shudder.  And then wonder what can be done personally and collectively. 

Yes, our daily lives are affected without a doubt.  I recall times when comments have been made that violence on tv shows, the shoot 'em up westerns, the cop shows, the other types of programs that are too common on tv...it invades our psyche. This comment only focused on tv programs. What about national and world news?!

Consider the opposite of shows and news: maybe a personal challenge to turning to a music channel, learning tai chi or yoga, meditation or exercise. Engaging in peaceful, relaxing outlets certainly has a meaningful ripple effect in ourselves, family and community. 

Wouldn't that be great?  Knowing that we can go into our day in a calm way, peaceful from the inside out that can change the world, one by one would be remarkable. 

Who needs to be churned up to the extent that happens with each day's news cast?  We can at least change our own reaction by turning it off, turning away and taking better care of ourselves. Wonder what our world would look like if that actually happened! 

Smokey

Ponder

A friend of mine called the other day sharing some things about her mom, now in rehab and really needing assisted living after that.  Her mom and she both thought it might be helpful if I visited, especially with my background as a spiritual director, hospital chaplain and now having taken care of my husband who had been in a nursing home.

 All sorts of thoughts went through my mind, of course, they were not all positive, which I hesitate to admit to you because then I fall right off a pedestal I might have been on with you, my dear readers!! So, yesterday I visited, and to my amazement as I was walking out, I thanked God that I did some good for someone. She was much lighter in spirit, too!

Her mom was very open, receptive and before I left she reflected and said, "I need to ponder some things."  I, too, was grateful for my religious upbringing, remember what Jesus's mother Mary said regarding "pondering many things" in her heart. 

How often do each of us need to "ponder many things" but  sometimes we don't  come to know what those things are by ourselves. This is where spiritual direction has been a boon to my own life, and others, just to have space to talk, be heard specifically by a trained person, and yet know whatever is shared is confidential.  

This is a new year, a new season and perhaps you might consider it for yourself or refer a friend or acquaintance.   Spiritual direction is not about religion, but about our spirit and finding that deeper meaning in life, our connection with the divine or holy in life; that is much, much broader than any religion or faith, that we each have no matter what.  So, for each of us, consider "pondering all these things" in our heart!   

Courtesy of Pixabay

HELP!

 HELP!  Have you ever wondered what good it would do to cry "help", wondering if your pleas will even go into the universe, let alone land on any ears that might hear it and offer help?  Well, if so, you're not alone. 

I am blessed to have my husband's wonderful workshop out back to putter in.  Let alone the fact that it needs a good vacuuming and moving some heavy tools around, I can envision having a small TV out there while I spend some time. 

Sure, easier said than done!  So out goes the TV; that was easy to carry out. Well, in the meantime I opened a cabinet full of glass jars as I searched for a screw, since the staple project on a small stool didn't work out.  Crash, the jar fell out, not only a broken glass all over but a bazillian washers that were inside!  

That's all swept into a pile now, waiting for the mood to strike to sort dirt, glass and washers!  No big deal; "I can turn on the TV while I clean it up", so I thought!  Sure, until the signal said, "NO WIFI!!"  

I gave up the ghost, locked the door and came inside..."one of those days!"  This a.m. while having coffee with a friend I asked if she'd like to hear how my day went yesterday!!!  Well, she pointed me in a direction, I went to that store, the owner pointed me to Office Max, I found what I needed and the clerk even pointed out a sale item to replace a more expensive one I had in my hand!  My day continued in this vein. 

Today, it was entirely different...everything went right...everything!  Well, we'll see.  I need to read directions for the WIFI booster before I try the TV again but my thoughts come to me, "maybe the universe, or God, is just waiting for us to say, "help" and then the right resource will appear.  That's how it seemed today!  So when life crashes glass jars on your floor, go have coffee with a friend!

Courtesy of Pixabay